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Nutter's Pharmacy

by Jonathan Hill
Originally published by on 29/03/2015

How Mr Nutter the pharmacist stayed in business was anyone's guess, for he hardly dispensed any prescriptions or sold any medicines.

"Have you anything for my sore throat?" an old lady asked.

"Certainly! That hat of yours suits you perfectly," replied Mr Nutter.

"I keep getting indigestion," complained another.

"You're looking particularly well-groomed today," replied Mr Nutter. "Next!"

Mr Pumphrey, a regular, staggered in clutching his chest. "My heart..."

Mr Nutter knew what to do. "Morning! Oh you've shined those shoes a treat, Mr Pumphrey!"

Moments before Mr Pumphrey collapsed, he’d passed a large banner outside that read ‘Complimentary Medicine’.

Jonathan Hill Merits

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